They want to keep you scared, that's all...

In one of the first posts I wrote on this blog, I shared my attitude when it comes to irresponsible overuse of antibiotics. I have the same healthy scepticism when it comes to all the vaccines that are developed against every other virus that engages itself in human pathology.

The hype right now is of course the swine flu, which is exactly just that - an influenza - and even though it is a relatively aggressive one, most hospitalizations and deaths have been of persons that also had underlying conditions such as asthma, diabetes, obesity, heart disease, or a weakened immune system. In other than that healthy persons, the signs of infection with swine flu have been similar to other forms of influenza, including fever, coughing, headaches, pain in the muscles or joints, sore throat, chills, fatigue and a runny nose. For all these people to vaccinate themselves, is to do their immune systems, as well as the human immune system on a meta level, a huge bear's favour.

In an article in SvD (in Swedish), the cell-biologist Ann-Cathrin Engwall criticises the intention to mass-vaccinate the Swedish population against the swine flu, by thoroughly explaining the virus/host biological system, as well as all the complications that might follow upon such an action as this vaccination. Even though a vaccine is a mimic of a real virus infection, and is meant to boost the immune system, a vaccine is never as effective as the real deal, and in the case of the swine flu the vaccine only gives a "protection" for six to nine months. Here we can draw a clear parallel to antibiotics abuse, where the humans as a result will become less tolerant to infections, while the virus evolves into a more aggressive form.

The human life style has during the last century become more and more "clean". The scientific discoveries of bacteria and viruses as pathological factors, as well as the discovery of penicillin to cure bacterial infections and vaccines to keep diseases away, have dramatically improved our ability to stay healthy, no doubt. I would neither deny the fact that some vaccines have succeeded to extinguish serious diseases, as well as that there are real indications for using antibiotics. However, it is now time for humanity to climb up one step on the evolutionary ladder and try to look upon ourselves as the natural organisms we actually are, and to have some faith in that. Instead we create a more and more clean environment and protect ourselves from the "dangerous" micro-organisms by using anti-bacterial products, hermetically closing up our homes and frantically clean ourselves and our children. In the meantime kids grow up with more and more severe allergies, while new and more aggressive diseases appear. There must be something wrong with this approach, because logically we should become healthier and stronger, since we remove the antagonists - or maybe not..?

When I was a kid I ate gravel and was dirty most of the time, just as a kid should be. I was never sick either. My generation did not get the MMR vaccine, against measles, mumps and rubella and therefore I had the measles as a kid, but not the other two diseases. I was only one year old when I had the measles and my mother has later told me about how dotted I was and how much it itched, but it was soon over. In a developed country like Sweden, measles almost never ended up causing any fatal complications, however, these days all Swedish kids get this vaccine even though there have been reports of complications following the vaccination.

What I am requesting is a more sensible approach to disease and their preventions. We are after all created with a natural immune system that when exercised properly keeps us tolerant against more than the media and medical companies want to admit. Don't forget that this is also an economical, as well as political issue...

Focusing training

Anat Miron, who leads the Kiryat Tivon Aikido, is also offering group courses, as well as one-on-one consultations in Focusing.

Focusing is a simple matter of holding a kind of open, non-judging attention to something which is directly experienced but is not yet in words. Focusing can be used to become clear on what one feels or wants. Focusing is set apart from other methods of inner awareness by three qualities: something called the "felt sense", a quality of engaged accepting attention, and a philosophy of what facilitates change.

(Wikipedia)

I promised her to publish her flyer with coming activities, so here goes. Click the image for magnification.

Four HUGE paws... Yes, a puppy!

The kids mum has a 12 weeks old German Shepherd puppy boy and today we brought him for a play in the park, with the kids and Goshen. I had the clicker and treats with me and worked with Goshen on the heeling and she is doing very well, but of course it was harder to focus when kids (including one adult kid) was playing around her, as well as a puppy. I also made Bossy, the pup, acquainted with the clicker, and in spite of all the distractions, as well as a somewhat jealous Goshen, he made some really nice progress on both come and sit, and it was the first time! It is really different to work with a small puppy, compared to an adult dog, since the pups are completely open in the mind and without too much preconceptions. I would never say that "you cannot teach old dogs to sit", but even if Goshen is a very obedient dog, the perfection were totally lost and she was used to mostly mind her own business. It therefore takes me a lot of patience and consistency to convince her that I am the "meatball" I want her to think that I am when we are working.

But Bossy! I guess that I am a little bit in love - no wonder! - and I wish that I could get the chance to work some more with him. I know that mummy does not have too much time anyway for him, and at the moment I have all the time in the world, so... Give me a session a day and you would see wonders!

Putting words in other peoples mouths...

A Palestinian journalist on Jerusalem Post, Khaled Abu Toameh, has been in touch with the Palestinian family and relatives of Bilal Ahmed Ghanem, the boy who Donald Boström suggested to have been harvested of his organs by the IDF in 1992.

The younger brother, Jalal, could not confirm any allegations and explained that:

“I don’t know if this is true. We don’t have any evidence to support this.”

The mother denies ever telling any foreign journalist that her sons organs were stolen, while another relative of Bilal claimed that the family never told the Swedish photographer that Israel has stolen organs from a dead mans body. He said:

“Maybe the journalist reached that conclusion on the basis of the stitches he saw on the body. But as far as the family is concerned, we don’t know if organs were removed from the body because we never performed our own autopsy. All we know is that Bilal’s teeth were missing.”

This is getting fishier and fishier... Rotten fish, that is.

Boring August!

I cannot wait for August to be over. The worst part is not the heat, but rather the fact that all my activities I have (the few I have so far) are down during this period. Ulpan (Hebrew school) has a summer break, Swedes I know here are in Sweden on holiday and during the day hours it is way too hot to be outdoors, training Goshen for any long moments. It is neither feasible go go many places without a car in this heat. Of course there are buses, but... you know... I lack inspiration. When Yoram is at work I keep myself busy by blogging, reading blogs and news, and self-studying some Hebrew, but there is a limit for that too. I know that I now appear as a lazy, whining bastard, but at least that part of me reveals it self pretty rarely.

Quote of the day...

The real problem in the Middle East is that we teach our children to exercise their memory but not their imagination.

Shimon Peres

Different rules for different people

I had a long comment exchange with a reader after my post about the IDF organ trafficking article in Aftonbladet, and we dealt with everything from anti-Semitism and the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, to freedom of press, aikido and karma. Unfortunately I initially turned the correspondence into Swedish, which I later regretted, but for you Swedish-speakers, you can go a head and have a look.

Anyhow, this reader helped me to look over my stand point when it comes to the freedom of press, when I realised that in a short moment of emotional turmoil I had not been completely consistent in my argumentation. This can happen to the best of us and I appreciated the lesson. Nevertheless, after some thorough thinking I am still convinced that I am a true defender of the freedom of press and a complete separation of press and government. However, I was later also reminded (not through the comment exchange, though) that the Swedish government has not been that consistent after all, if we look back...

During the Muhammad caricature crisis in 2005, the website host Levonline, pulled the plug on the website of the Swedish Democrats' SD-Kuriren newspaper after consulting with the government. You might say that consulting is not the same as giving an order, but we can only speculate on what happened behind closed doors during their consulting. In that case the Swedish Foreign Minister Laila Freivalds said in an official statement:

"I will defend freedom of the press no matter what the circumstances, but I strongly condemn the provocation by SD-Kuriren. It displays a complete lack of respect."

But of course, then we had a different government, and guess which one... I wonder what makes the violent reaction from the Muslim world over some drawings more acceptable and mature than the Israeli/Jewish reaction over these very severe accusations. But once again, different rules for different people.

Update: Laila Freivalds actually resigned after this scandal.

I can admit that during a period of my younger adolescence I was completely impregnated with the Swedish Pro-Palestine/Anti-Israeli attitude and I fully believed that Israel represented the devil himself and that the Palestinians merely were poor victims. Luckily I am blessed with a critical and curious personality and I soon discovered that things are not always what they seem, and this conflict could not be blamed to merely one of the parties.

When I met Yoram and suddenly had personal ties with Israel, my interest in the conflict grew, for natural reasons. I started reading both history and news from diverse sources and the more I learned, the more I realised that the solution is far-fetched and there is nothing as clear as a good and a bad side. Tragically enough, after having monitored the Swedish media reports on the matter for a while, it stood clear to me how biased the information fed to the Swedes really is. The socialist media basically glorifies Jihad and martyrdom, and exclusively puts the blame on Israel, while the liberal media acts as if intimidated, by being quite sparse with their positive words about Israel.

Boström must have been aware that this publication would become a clear incitement against Israel that will only increase hate and prejudice (i.e. anti-Semitism), and create a stronger polarisation, that in turn will damage the peace process. If he really was interested in working for peace in the region, a better strategy would be to offer some constructiveness. But I am quite certain that this is not his goal. As with so many others, he wants to see Israel collapse before he is satisfied. Why do you think that is..?

Now the energy battery in the politics section of my brain has been emptied and it will probably take a while to refill it...

August is peaking...

The entrance to the "Cave of Coffins" in Beit She'arim

The real August weather is here and it rises above 35 degrees every day, and then I am of course referring to the shadow! Today it was also extremely humid, even here in Tivon. During the day we turn on the AC at home, but still not during the night. I think I have proven, though, that I am not too badly affected by this climate. I explained to Yoram during the spring that I don't tend to suffer too much from high temperature and humidity and now it turns out that he is complaining far more than I do.

We took a walk down to Beit She'arim in the late afternoon and went down in the caves, and that was better than any AC. We ran around in all the cool rooms and jumped around in the sarcophaguses for quite a while, and when we finally ascended, it was like walking into an invisible wall of warm and wet air. I love that feeling...

Aftonbladet is the Swedish "Weekly World News"

15th century woodcut showing Jews murdering the child Simon of Trent. In Hartmann Schedel, Nuremburg Chronicle or Buch der Chroniken, printed by Anton Koberger in 1493. The round yellow patches are badges that Jews were forced to wear. Names of protagonists like Thobias and Angelus are labelled.

Swedish press has hit a new disgraceful low-mark. The anti-Semite Donald Boström has created a contemporary version of the ancient blood libel against the Jews, by tying together loose ends of unrelated stories and simple lies. Plenty of responses have already been written and it has been blogged about this scandal. Therefore I avoid to put too much effort into repeating things, and I just provide you with the links.

I can only quote the Swedish Ambassador in Israel, Elisabeth Broslin Bonnier:

"Just as in Israel, freedom of the press prevails in Sweden. However, freedom of the press and freedom of expression are freedoms which carry a certain responsibility. It falls on the editor-in-chief of any given newspaper."

In this case, the responsibility to apply morals, common sense and above all truthfulness, has been ruthlessly neglected and Aftonbladet has proved itself to be a cheap conspiracy paper who does not avoid any means to sell loose numbers.

Peace is a martial art

"Aiki is to pull when you are pushed, and to push when you are pulled. It is the spirit of slowness and speed, of harmonizing your movement with your opponent's ki. Its opposite, kiai, is to push to the limit, while aiki never resists."

-- Takeda Sokaku

Morihei Ueshiba (O'Sensei) was the founder of aikido as we know it today, but the technical curriculum of aikido was undoubtedly most greatly influenced by the teachings of Takeda Sokaku and his system of aiki-jujutsu called Daito-ryu. The early form of training under Ueshiba was characterized by the use of atemi and a more linear approach to technique and this is what can be seen preserved in the teachings of his early students, that later founded styles like Yoshinkan Aikido and Shodokan Aikido, but also Morihiro Saito's Iwama-ryu. As Ueshiba grew older, more skilled, and more spiritual, his art also changed and became softer and more circular and he started putting a greater emphasis on what is referred to as kokyu-nage, or "breath throws" which are soft and blending, utilizing the opponent's movement in order to throw them. These techniques are rooted in the aiki-no-jutsu portions of the Daito-ryu curriculum rather than the more direct jujutsu style joint-locking techniques, hence, the circle was closed by reconnecting to this ancient wisdom.

"The secret of aiki is to overpower the opponent mentally at a glance and to win without fighting."

-- Takeda Sokaku

This peaceful approach to solving a conflict demands a lot from the practitioner, not only years and years of aikido practice in a dojo, but also a deep knowledge of oneself, involving development of a genuine inner confidence and harmony, as well as a well disciplined ego. This parallel advancement of body and mind makes the principles of aikido spread out and impregnate your approach to other people also outside of the dojo. You decrease the impact of your pride and your ego, which are the forces that makes you use kiai instead of aiki in any kind of conflict, physical as well as verbal, although fortunately verbal conflicts are more frequent for the most of us. You become permeable and smooth and not many things can really provoke you anymore. This gives a strong sense of inner freedom.

It is also this same lack of pride and ego, together with confidence and calm, that enables us to accept a technique and absorb it as uke. The ability to be in the point of contact and take the ukemi without resistance, will ultimately put you back in a ground position, or hamni, faster than if you resist and reluctantly take ukemi. Bottom line is that everything is connected and ruled by the same principles and this is the universal law of the aiki...

Not all kids behave like ours...

We had a friend of Ziv's over for lunch today. It is not the first time he eats with us. I had made fried breaded fish filet, boiled potatoes, carrots and broccoli and a cold tartar sauce. Both Ziv and Gal of course complained over everything and basically had to be hand-fed. Gal did not touch any vegetables at all and Ziv was after a long and difficult persuasion able to eat a few pieces of carrot, but no broccoli.

Ziv's friend happily put loads of all different things on his plate and ate with a good appetite. He loved my tartar sauce and took several refills of food. He also has excellent table manners, while around the two others it looked like someone detonated a food bomb, including the kids themselves.

Is it possible to make children exchanges..?

Meat was created to be eaten

Finding pork products in a country with predominantly Jewish and Arab citizens is not completely straight-forward easy, in spite of the fact that a large portion of the people here are secular and don't really keep kosher. A few decades ago, it would still be pretty much impossible, but now the world has changed and human monocultures are not really feasible anymore.

However, according to me, Miss Piggy is the origin of numerous local or common delicacies and all the forgeries made from chicken, turkey, or whatever else, cannot never, ever compare to the real deal. We have found Mizra Maadaney, near Afula, where they have a large sorting of pork products and the other day we went there, tasted, looked and bought. Many of the products where locally produced, but they also had imported stuff, although I still lacked a genuine Parma ham, or maybe some Italian truffle salami. On the other hand they had sausages that when grilled taste just like prinskorvar and this was a hit not only for the adults, but also with the picky kids. Other than that, we bought some spicy chorizo and some air-dried marbled neck meat. If any other sinner has some tips on where they have good pork products, please share this information!

As far as I am concerned, meat is always meat, and I am not affected by whether the animal was cute, ugly or belonging to a species that people hold as pets. I would taste any kind of meat (any kind of food) when presented to it and I would later on judge it after taste and not after origin. Some of the finest meat comes from species that in some countries are considered too cute to eat, like rabbit for example. On the other hand, frog legs and alligator are also some of the most delicious meats I have ever tasted. Miss Piggy also has a well-deserved place in the group of tasty meat.

Set the aiki free...

To say that aikido is a hobby for me would be a grave understatement and an insult to the art. Many are the people that go to their aikido class on a regular basis, but as they leave the dojo, they also leave the aikido there. They would neither consider training a little bit extra after the class is over, or on some other occasion outside of the formal schedule. This is their choice and nothing I put any judgement in, because when the day is over it is still better that they do some aikido than nothing at all. This is also a thing that depends on the aikido "culture" from which every person has started off. In some dojo's you simply don't do any more aikido when the class is over, whereas in other places this is encouraged.

For me, the class is the forum where you are introduced to new things, corrected and inspired. After-class practice is where you implement and drill this new knowledge. If I don't get any of this free practice, I cannot feel whole and satisfied. I don't think that free practice really existed here in Israel before the group started to mingle with the Swedes and go to Lillsved summer camp, where all of us are constantly doing aikido; before, in between and after classes. Now the Israelis got a taste of it and together with my arrival into the group a strong force started whirling around. Since we got back from Sweden we have stayed after class on several occasions, first only Yoram and me, but after the last practice we were 5 people who stayed and we did a lot of high falls training and it was loads of fun. I think we might have a small movement going here, that will be hard to put in reverse...

Concert in Herzliya

Yesterday I went to Tel Aviv with Yoram in the morning and he dropped me off at the beach, where I spent a few hours, trying to regain some of the tan that miraculously (?) disappeared during my weeks in Sweden. All sun tolerance was gone and my cheeks and nose were pinkish and radiating heat in the evening, in spite a thorough application of my good sunscreen.

Later I walked to Yoram's office which is about a 30 min walk, but in August it feels much longer. In Tel Aviv the humidity is much higher than in Tivon and we clearly notice the difference when we get there. It is almost like you can drink the air and one wonders when people will start developing gills.

In the afternoon we went to Hadar's place and freshened up before the evening, which we spent in Herzliya where they arranged a big show at the beach, with Avraham Tal and Yehudit Ravitz. Both performances where astonishing. I am well acquainted with Avraham Tal, as you have read before, but I have not listened to a lot of Yehudit Ravitz' material previously. I only recognised a few songs, but she did a great show. She started of pretty quiet, but built up the energy progressively and the last part was amazing and she truly has a new fan in me.

The concerts where over around 23.00 and then we did not go home, but instead we drove into the centre of Tel Aviv again and went to a pub where a friend of Hadar's works. We were already tired, and besides that we were about to take on the kids early in the morning after, but we kept on. Tel Aviv never sleeps and the traffic made the trip quite tiresome. After a few beers and shots in the pub we drove Hadar to Givatayim and then we drove the one hour drive home to Tivon and we were home around 02.00. Swedes would never drive around these long distances late in the evening unless they were on drugs...

The mysterious little people

I have no siblings, and my cousins have never been close to me. I have never had kids around me as an adult either, and that is not something I ever felt that I lacked. I did not understand these odd creatures and I never bothered either. I want at least one for myself and I am sure that I will turn out to be an excellent mother, loving and caring, but never a "curling parent" who is over-protective and serve their kids too eagerly.

Now I am in a quite different situation than getting one of my own. Now I have two half-grown ones that I cannot even talk to freely in a common language yet and still we are supposed to live under the same roof. I knew it would become hard, but it is even harder. I am striving to find my role and some days after the kids are asleep I am crying my guts out in pure frustration caused by my feeling of helplessness. Other times we find a channel for a moment where the communication works and we connect, and then I am filled with joy. Big challenge for Jojo, for sure! He must be something very special, that Yoram...

Stuffed Shepherd

Our thief, in one of her sleeping postures

Today I went with Yoram and Gal to the pool for a few hours, while Ziv decided to stay at home. In the morning Yoram had taken schnitzel out from the freezer and put it on top of the stove, as we normally do. He had left the lid off, but somewhere during the morning hours I laid the lid loosely on top of the box. When we left the house we did not move it, since Goshen never dares to snatch any food, and besides that, Ziv was at home.

When we came home I walked out to the kitchen and I saw a plastic box on the floor together with some messy cellophane, and the situation was so unusual and surrealistic that I did not even immediately understand what I was watching. I asked Yoram "What is this?" upon which he answered, with a slight delay, "It is your dog who has just eaten 1 kg of schnitzel, and look at that guilty face...", while pointing at Goshen. Clearly he has, I hope temporarily, disowned her! And it should be added that Ziv was sitting five meters away in the room and did not notice a thing of what had been going on. Amazing how inattentive kids can be...

Had we caught her in action a punishment would have been in place, but in this case that was of no use, no matter what some "old-school doggy besserwisser's" might say. Her punishment is a very boring day and one or two days of fasting. When I took her for an afternoon pee pee ride, she healed better than I guess she did ever before in her life.

And what do we learn from this? Don't leave food in reach of an animal with natural instincts, not even under supervision of confused kids.

Cleaning the beach...

The rocky part of our beach

Yesterday afternoon we took Goshen to the beach for a few hours. "Our" beach is in some aspects a remote part of the coast line and therefore never crowded. Because of this there is neither any organised collecting of garbage. As I have told you before, a way too large number of Israelis show no respect to this beautiful nature and make no effort to bring their crap to the nearest garbage bin. As far as I am concerned, the lack of one is never a reason to leave garbage. In that case, you pack it in your car and bring it home!

We always bring a few plastic bags and fill them with garbage, first thing at arrival, and also when we bring the kids they get a lesson in being green. A few days ago some sea vessel dumped a large amount of garbage, plastic bags, sacks and rope outside of Israel and we got to see the result of that when we arrived yesterday. Our bags were filled much faster than normal. Sad, very sad...

Other than that, if was with great joy I was reunited with HaYam. The water is now 30 degrees and it has no cooling effect whatsoever. The jellyfish season is over and you just roll around in the water constantly. We also walked over to the rocky part and watched the tiny shrimps and fish between the rocks. We then discovered our own free and natural version of Fish Pedicure. When we put the feet in the small pools all the shrimps started crawling over the feet, nibbling and pulling on skin flakes and other dead tissue. However, I think the process here would be more time-consuming than with the real Doctor Fish...

Sachne surprise

One of the water falls in Sachne, seen from above

The kids' aunt lives in kibbutz Nir David in Beit She'an valley, which I have told you about before. The heat here during summer is almost unbearable, but nevertheless they have the Asi river flowing straight through the kibbutz and this makes it very green and flourishing. The Asi river is also connected to one of the most famous attractions in Israel, Sachne, or Gan HaShlosha National Park, which is a natural water park with springs, pools and all-year-around warm water.

We were about to celebrate Ziv's 9th birthday and the whole family gathered in the kibbutz in the afternoon, the aunt fetched the key and we slipped in through the back door to Sachne, after closing hours. After the customary argument with the guards in the jeep, we spread our picnic out, indulged ourselves in all the pools before we went back to the picnic spot, barbecued and ate loads of food. All of a sudden it was pitch black and in merely a few minutes everybody had collected garbage and packed everything in the cars, including the correct kids and dogs, and the party was over, true Israeli style, and the phlegmatic blueberry hardly reacted before it was too late.

Sachne is one of the places on my list to visit and the fact that I suddenly found myself there yesterday was somewhat of a surprise, because I was not really aware that the park was connected to this kibbutz. I had only comprehended that we were going to the kibbutz and just like on many other occasions I have kind of been floating on top of the planning since I still cannot follow fully in the Hebrew. Sometimes ignorance really can become bliss...

Recycling in Israel

For all of you out there in Israel who have some environmental conscience, I have required two tips on how to get rid of stuff that is not accounted for as household garbage.

Snunit Recycling (mostly Hebrew website) has stations in all of the large cities and they accept all kinds of appliances and electronics, but it does not seem like they take on fridges, and I guess that has to do with the cooling liquids that need to be taken care of in a certain way.

Agora is a website (Hebrew) where you can announce stuff that you want to get rid of, and I assume that many of the people in the "garbage business" keep a good eye on this site. Only rule is that the items are offered without any charge. However, here you cannot be certain that the item is not stripped and the leftovers dumped in the nature.

If any of the readers have more tips, please make a comment. Fridges still seem like something no one except the guys in station wagons want to take on, and as far as I am concerned, I would feel more comfortable leaving the next old fridge to some acknowledged station than just out in the street...

"Use and throw" culture

We have a new fridge in the house. We bought a used one through Yad2 for 500 ILS, which is about 1000 SEK. The landlord said that she wanted the old fridge back, since it was hers and we just borrowed it, but Yoram convinced her that it is too old to waste any more money on. Now I suddenly had another direct encounter with an aspect of this society that I find very difficult to accept. I have previously discussed the Israeli habit of throwing garbage where they stand and in this case I touch the same subject. In Sweden you would have taken this old fridge to the nearest recycling station, where it would have been taken care of according to all rules and regulations, and every little piece would be put into use again thanks to our excellent recycling culture.

Here, instead Yoram had the carriers simply putting the fridge out in the street, next to the garbage container, claiming that it is garbage (very big garbage though) and that there is really not any option, because there is nowhere to dispose these things. And then he dared me to bet on how long the fridge will stay there, because obviously there are garbage collectors that pick up this kind of stuff and use what they can out of them.

Even Yoram was surprised, when already within an hour a guy arrived and lifted the big fridge all by himself into his station wagon, secured it with some rope and took off. This is a phenomenon that of course develops anywhere when an option is not provided by the state, but after all, I cannot avoid immediately drawing the connection to the path down in the valley below the house, where old things and garbage are dumped all the time, which of course causes irritation in both of us. I am imagining the day when we walk there and stumble upon the old fridge, stripped of its valuable parts. On the other hand I cannot blame Yoram for his action. Better that someone gets to use whatever possible from the fridge, than himself tugging the fridge down to the beautiful valley below and just dumping it there. Besides that, I can only pray that the guy in the station wagon is responsible. I guess it takes more than 60 years after all to develop the "perfect" society...

The quest for the point of no resistance

(Picture by Lisa Larsson)

I am standing in a deep kamae and Samuel is grabbing my wrist with a deep and strong, but still quiet, gyakuhamni katatedori. Katina is standing behind me, firmly holding my head with both hands, to keep my central axis straight. Jorma is standing on the side with his whole attention focused on the meeting between the two hands, as well as the dymanics of my upper body, as I initiate opening the door to the tai no tenkan. I fill my wrist with life and try to imagine that I move my hand deeply from the marrow of my bones, in a spiral movement forward, doing my best to facilitate Samuel in following. Samuel's grip is firmly attached, with the deepest contact from his Lao Gong point, but he is still free and flexible in his shoulders and arms and he is completely focused on keeping the contact between our hands. I focus on lowering my shoulder and letting the energy flow through my chest, but still, Jorma suddenly shouts "I see edge, I see edge! Go in there, wait and dissolve it..."

This a typical example of a situation during a deshi aikido practice with Jorma - one of many I have experienced. The goal with this exploration is to create an aikido that makes you feel good after every technique, and the edge he is talking about is representing every time you get a feeling of resistance in the grip or the rest of the body, a feeling of breaking loose or simply a very superficial and unconnected contact. Well, some of you might think, how has this soft and agreeing attitude got anything to do with budo? The fact is that it has everything to do with budo. The work uke does, at enhancing his presence and focus on being at the point, is exactly what later on enables you to follow freely when someone like Christian Tissier decides to express a lot of power in his shihonage, without you feeling any form of physical anxiety or pain from the ride. This is in the end a matter of being able to take care of yourself and the extension is of course that you can return with a new attack much sooner.

Using power of a different quality, or giving resistance through tensing parts of your body, has the same effect on the ki flow as road blocks on a highway. Traffic halts and the participants become filled with feelings of frustration and unpleasantness. On the other hand, when you occasionally, if even for a split second, find the point where there is a free flow, you get in contact with something that is higher than anything that can be explained by words and you are filled with a feeling of harmony and unity. This is what I believe is the essence of aikido and this particular point in space and time has healing properties on the ones that discover it.

If you study an animal, for example a dog, they can rest for hours, then suddenly wake up, and after a quick stretch they are fit to do whatever is on the menu. Their bodies are in a constant state of free flow and they never seem to become stale or tense. What differs us from the animals is first of all that our higher mental and emotional levels also give us the disadvantage that we accumulate more luggage, which in turn expresses itself psycho-somatically through tensions and blockings in our bodies. Our daily routines also prevents us from a natural movement pattern, but instead we compensate sitting at the office with physical exercise of different kinds that through its artificial nature many times exceeds the capacity of the body, which also creates unwanted physical symptoms. When I encounter an edge in the katatedori, I have to go all the way up to my shoulders to find the solution, or even sometimes deep down in my soul. This kind of work is of course all about building confidence and trust and without striving towards the same goal it will not be easy to to find the point where you are fulfilled with well-being, and what prevents us from doing the work is only our ego and preconceptions.

When two dogs play, they always know very well what are the boundaries, and this very fine-tuned perception can also be experienced when you yourself play with a dog. You can both increase the level of power used in the play, and this increase is always built on a mutual consent, but at the instant where the dog perceives a true discomfort from your part, at the same moment the dog will halt the play and instead show an interest in that you are OK and not hurt. This is a reflexive reaction that depends on a clear awareness and sensibility, and this ability has to a far extent been lost in the humans and this becomes especially clear in aikido practice, where physically strong persons often have a very tough time to truly understand their own strength and being able to meet a physically weaker partner with care and presence. For some people, even understanding the point with getting there, might be far-fetched. I wish for them to at some point experience the point of no resistance...

Blueberry is back with her sabra

Another smooth Sabraexpress flight (and passport control) later, and I am back home in Tivon, Israel. Goshen almost jumped out of her skin from happiness and the Swedish flag, as well as the Scanian, are standing together on a shelf as I arrive to the house. Let's see how long I will stand that. The fridge has broken even more than the last time and we spend our first evening together searching Yad2 (the Israeli version of Blocket) for a new one. It will simply be cheaper to get a new one than fixing the old one, which is not even ours. The food is moved to the ex's house and we are celebrating my homecoming with leftovers and warm beer. Nevertheless, my strongest feeling this day is the enjoyable sensation of coming home...

Time to go back home...

Today is my last day in Sweden and tomorrow morning I am flying back to Israel. I have added a blue sun hat with yellow crowns to my collection of Swedish items and I have crossed all boundaries for how geeky you can become. I thought it might be nice to have on the beach when the sun is too strong, and I can also use it when we are going to have a kräftskiva with the Swedish crew in August.

The weather is getting better every day and I think that the Swedish summer will restart now for real, when the time has come for me to return to the August heat wave in Israel. Had I spent the previous months in Sweden I would probably be more affected by the up-until-now moody weather, but since I was fulfilled with sun when I arrived I have been pretty much indifferent to the weather. Yoram, who is already home in Israel, is dead beat by the heat and it will be interesting to see how far my climate tolerance will last. In any way, I look forward to be back home...

My Vanadis debut

Yesterday I was asked whether I would consider to lead the Friday evening class at the Vanadis dojo in Stockholm and the first reaction was characterised by the limbic flee-or-fight system, but when I had got an OK from Jorma I agreed and felt that it would be a fun and developing experience. It is not the first time I teach (or lead) aikido, but the first time in this dojo, and above all the first time with this large number or very competent participants. There were about 20 practitioners, together holding more than 35 dan's and I think that the number of advanced aikidokas in the room was so high that it somehow took the edge off of my nervousness. It can also be explained by the unique atmosphere that I experience with these people, where everybody is humble and relaxed and want everybody to feel good. Three days more of aikido here and then I head home to my man and my dog. I miss them!