The cosmic order of things

The quest for aiki is also an inevitable path towards humbleness. No one aikidoka is as good when self-reflected, as the beginner who has practised for a year or two. If not sooner, many stumble into their first aikido crisis when they receive their first dan grade and the desirable black belt. They wake up the next morning and discover that nothing really changed, on the contrary, the journey has merely begun. The more advanced you get, your skills become more fine-tuned, and the progress will appear more subtle and far-fetched. The longer you have practised, the more there is left to learn.

Around previously mentioned stages of megalomania, some aikidokas get consumed by the desire to become teachers themselves, and without too much introspection on whether they really have something to offer, they just blindly thrive in the centre of attention. They build their own dojo, but have nothing substantial to fill it with. Jorma Lyly once explained to me how there is a cosmic order in how things like these develop. An old Buddhist proverb says "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear". Well, in aikido the other way around is more suitable "When the teacher is ready, the students will appear". Anything else is just being self-absorbed.

It was with this in mind that I accepted Anati's offer to give the lesson yesterday in our dojo. I have never aspired to become a teacher. It never appealed to me in that way. After I moved to Israel was the first time that I realised that I had something to offer, but up until now I have only been at everyone's service on the side, helping out with the soft high falls and other bits and pieces that they wanted, but I was never up front, leading the practice. Now Anati wanted me to share some of the things that I had experienced during my weeks in Sweden, with Endo Sensei, Jorma/Jan, but also Stefan. We had a wonderful practice and I just went in there and did my own thing. It is not the first time that I lead an aikido practice, but it never felt as natural and right as it did yesterday with these people.

After the practice everybody was thrilled over the interesting exercises we had done and the approach that I had, and then Anati suddenly said "I have this crazy idea". Last time she said that it resulted in our morning practices in her garden, but now her idea was instead to let me give some lessons, not every week (we have only two lessons per week at the moment), but nevertheless on a regular basis, to give them as she said "some Swedish aikido". Surprised and humble, I welcomed her idea. Maybe Jorma was right when he said that I have started to build something "over there", but I would rather say that I am merging together with something already existing, bringing inspiration to something that is already splendid.